mustardelbow:

actionjackel:

no thanks

fucking yaoi hands.

(Source: stahl-ebooks)

tush:

My wife didn’t appreciate my fridge magnet poem.

You’re Probably Not Really a Nice Guy (x)

(Source: sassy-hook)

towritelesbiansonherarms:

sassygayalexkralie:

i’M GOING TO FUCKING SHIT

OK I GOT THIS EXTENSION STAYFOCUSD THAT STOPS ME FROM BROWSING SITES MORE THAN A SET AMOUNT EACH DAY AND I ACCIDENTALLY SET IT TO 10 MINUTES PER 24 HOURS WHICH WAS WAY DRACONIAN AND I DIDNT NOTICE ‘TIL THE 60 SECOND COUNTER WAS GOING AND

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SO I THOUGHT IT WAS OVER RIGHT AFTER ALL THAT BUT NO

IT OPENED THIS FUCKING PAGE

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GOD

DAMN

brilliant

(Source: shinyumbre0n)

lyannas:

Social Justice Warrior A has leveled up! Social Justice Warrior wants to learn the move Self-Righteous Call Out. However, Social Justice Warrior A already knows four moves. Which move will be deleted to make room for Self-Righteous Call Out? 

a) All White Women are Racist So Your Experience of Sexism and Misogyny is Invalid

b) Put the Femme Back in Feminism

c) John Green is the Worst Person Ever and I Spend an Inordinate Amount of Time Detailing Why 

d) Unoriginal White Girl Joke 

ender-friend:

ender-friend:

my little brother came into my room and told me that there was water all over the bathroom floor so i got up and grabbed a towel and ran into the bathroom to find all of my water energy pokemon cards sprawled out on the floor this kid is 5 fucking years old and he got me

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do you think this is a fucking game (because he does)

(Source: imperialvizierzorlok)

toopunktofuck:

whenever dudebros go into some middle school biology spiel about how people are animals and men are just doing what male animals do

I just want to tell them

did you know:
jumping spider males are forced to dance for their mates, and if their courting dance is flawed the female eats him

u sure u wanna go about the animal kingdom

patientfine-balanced-kind:

it always amuses me when guys get nosebleeds

they seem so shocked and dismayed that this could happen

i mean, blood gushing out of a hole in your body making it impossible to laugh or cough or cry without spurting sticky red liquid everywhere?

that 

must

suck

(Source: daenerys-khaleesi)

bakerstreetbabes:

boyinthemachine:

Okay, by just looking at the artwork I deduce that all Holmes and Watson are doing 24/7 is basically sitting around in chairs while judging everything (unless they get up to judge more ppl).

I mean, seriously:

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even each other

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DYING.

spookymormon:

i found my 2nd grade diary

bigrnac:

im kinda happy but i also really wanna get hit by a car at the same time

(Source: ouijasquiji)